Turning 30, from a
professional point of view
Does the blog of a
young HR professional, become the blog of a HR professional? A story of a journey,
that is just beginning and 30 professional and life lessons to take home.
After a 2-year break
from my last article, for various personal and professional reasons, I decided
it is perhaps a good time to incorporate my own analysis and conclusions at the
dawn of my 30th birthday and what it means, if it means anything,
from a professional point of view. The below article is focused on a business
overview of the milestone, that is moving from your 20s to your 30s.
Turning 30 is a
moment that many consider important, in their lives. From a professional point
of view, however, the real question is not – does it matter, but rather what it
means.
Since speaking
in general or about anyone else can only be an assumption, as always, I will
use my own experience as the example and source of information for the below.
I have decided
it is perhaps best to divide the article into 3 main topics:
1. What I thought my professional life would
be at 30 (The Dream)
2. What my professional life and experience
actually is at 30 (The Reality)
3. What are the 30 most important lessons,
that I have learned that might help more professionals worldwide (The journey is more important than the
destination)
One of the great
many lessons that I have learned so far in my life Is that people rarely
remember a PowerPoint presentation, or pie-charts, but they always seem to
remember a story. So, let me tell you a story ….
The dream
We all
start with a dream, not a goal, but a
dream. Not that there is too much of a difference, however even if we have
a plan (which many would agree is the difference between the two) I am sure you
would agree that at the age of 4, that plan would probably lack the necessary
steps and actions necessary for achieving your dreams. Of course, many would
say - how many children have dreams or life goals, let alone business ones –
the real answer is – not a lot, but I did.
I was
perhaps a bit fortunate, or not, to be born in some of the direst times of my
home country and as such, my family and the society I lived in – post-communist
Bulgaria. Almost complete economic collapse, a divided society, food and basic
commodities deficits and an uncertain future was how I would describe my early
life, but it comes with a “however”. Many
would say – how could you say after the above description that you were
fortunate, but as I said – there is a however. The however was, that after
living for 45 years under a dictatorship, I was born and grew up with the most
important value – hope. Hope that the worst is behind us, hope that with hard
work, a brighter future will come, hope, that our destinies are finally our
own. I am certain, that a childhood of comfort, of many toys, of a care-free
life, that perhaps many children in the developed world had, would have been
better, but there is a strange sense of motivation for one’s own development,
when your childhood is 500,000 people protesting for democracy, when you see
what it actually takes to make a life out of nothing, when your role models are
your own parents providing you with a good education and values in times of
absolute chaos. I cannot say that I was deprived of my childhood, but I can say
that I was given much more – a very
early lesson, that if you want something in life, you will have to dedicate
yourself to it, no matter the cost, the risks or the journey to it. My parents
dream, was for me to have a better life than the one they did.
It was from that point, that
instead of children’s books I was listening about self-made people of success
and what I learned was that most of
them, were not people of privilege, but rather people of vision, of
self-sacrifice, of dedication, but above all – professionals, that not only
endured the hardships of their early lives, which broke many others, but they
took all the pain, uncertainty and unfairness and made them into people of success.
I was
privileged in the sense, that both of my parents were not only well educated
but were also people of vision. They knew something, that for a parent must
have been hard – that even though they were now living in a democratic,
market-economy and law-abiding society, it will take decades, at least, before
they and myself can live the “normal” life, that we considered most people in
the West were living. As such, the first dream that they incorporated in me and
that I took as my early life’s mission – was to immigrate and educate myself
abroad. (The old system, cannot teach
you how to succeed in the new one). It is perhaps a horrible thing to say that
leaving everyone and everything you know, on the sheer hope of a better life,
is a dream, but only 7 years after the political changes, after the now
self-declared socialists (who were the same people that “governed” the country
of the last 45 years) brought the country to bankruptcy, it was clear that my
parents hopes have been corrupted and sold out. From that moment onwards, I
knew there is only one way for me and others like me – a one-way ticket.
Since the
USA was the role model for opportunity without limit, (regardless of your view,
what is America, if not the shining example of how people who work hard, can
not only create a great life, but also one of the most successful and
established countries in human history), I followed the business model that
1990s America was promoting, at least for people who have not invented
something amazing, which sadly I have not – get a good education, work your way
through the corporate ladder to the very top and then change the world.
Here comes my real goal, and I expect many
would laugh here - I wanted to become the world richest man. It is a vague
dream, unless you know why, of course. I wanted to achieve this, not for some
grand world-domination goal, or prestige, or sheer mercantilism, but because I
knew that money makes the world go round.
In reality, and it took me many years to understand this, I was just following
my father’s dream – to live in a civilized society with endless opportunity,
which was his fathers dream before him and his before him. They were unlucky,
because they were and are also man of vision, dedication, hard work and risk
takers, but they were deprived of any and all chances in a dictatorship. So
many years later I realized, that I wanted to have it all, not for myself, but
so that one day someone with my last name can set his or her own goals,
regardless of what they are. (but I will get to that a bit later)
So,
rolling the clock 10 years later, I was almost 18 years old. I had learned
English to the level, of which it could not be distinguished that I was not a
native speaker. I read endless amounts of literature and study books on
history, politics, economics, business, psychology and other subjects of that
sort. I knew what an international
career would take – adaptability, tact, communication skills, analytical
behavior, hunger for knowledge and experience, comfort in uncertainty and
dedication. I ignored all the self-destructive “habits” that young
people growing up, not just in Eastern Europe, do – excessive drinking,
smoking, drugs, fighting, crime or other endangering activities. I even stayed
away from serious relationships because I knew I could allow myself to “fall in
love” and abandon my dreams. At the end of the day, the road of ambition is a road for one. (I would hate to lie and
say I did not do all of the above, but I can say with a hand on my heart it was
never excessive or dangerous).
I had a simple risk assessment matrix when faced with anything:
1.
Will it get me closer to my goal
or further?
2.
Can it endanger myself or my
goals?
Simple as this. That is, what I
learned another 10 years later, called strategic
management – to align all your actions and activities to a single tangible
goal.
Most people would call it crazy –
to deprive yourself of the simple “pleasures” or stages of a young life, but
most people lack the necessary lessons in history, about those that wrote it
and how they lived their lives. Or as the below goes:
Always remember – that most people will live their lives like
a leaf in a stream, going somewhere, pushed by the current, not themselves.
People told Rembrandt – “You will never
be an artist, you have only 1 ear. He replied – Sorry, I cannot hear you”. Today I think we all know who Rembrandt
is, but I do not think if anyone remembers his critics.
It was with a sense of achievement
that I can say that at that stage, everyone would describe me as one of the
most dedicated, hardworking, intelligent and ambitious young people they know. But
it was time to start the real journey.
I am sure that a 3-page
introduction to my story might be a bit too much, but how can you understand my
goals, if you do not know what made them goals.
So, to answer the
initial question – what I through my professional life would be at the age of
30, the answer is – a well-educated manager, in a large corporation, in
either a West European country or the USA, with a track record of success and
already established the basic needs in life – a house, a car and enough money
in the bank, not to worry if and where I work.
And so, the journey started – I
started my BBA in the Netherlands, studying International Business and
Management. Luckily for me the education in the Netherlands (which is
categorically one of the best I have seen) allows you to experience in your
first year all the specialties, so I found HR – a fantastic combination of
business and psychology, relying on the only resource that will never stop
developing – the human being. (Of course for most people, HR are a few ladies
and gents who sign your contract and can advise you on your sick leave, but of
course this is not even close to what real HR is, or at least the HR that I was
educated in) As a pragmatic person I also measured that it is internationally
applicable and I can get a starting job in it, almost anywhere. Thus, started
the idea of a “young HR”. I was taking every lesson, team-based project, piece
of literature and opportunity. I was blessed to have some of the most forward
thinking “revolutionaries” in the field as my teachers, who did not teach us
the what, the how or the where, but they thought us something more important – to always seek “the why”. To dissect every situation to its core
until key problems or solutions immerge and to then use our own business
knowledge and attitude to transform them into ideas and projects to the develop
the business we were in. For most of my fellow students, it was just an
education or the “bla-bla” that 4 elderly Dutchmen were paid to do, but for me,
it was the final academic gift that I needed – the tools and mindset to jump
without fear, to see opportunities everywhere, to know that the world is a sandbox and everything and
everyone in it, can be shaped, by those who know what they are doing.
So far, so good, right?
Almost. Life has a sense of humor,
especially for those who make plans. It was 2011, the financial crisis was at
its peak, I was still no one from nowhere, who also needed a work permit. So,
all my “greatness” was unfortunately hard to put on a CV with zero (relevant) work
experience. I was facing the hard truth that most graduates understand, that in
the university you are being prepared to be a director, or at least a manager,
but in reality, making coffee for a boss might be a bit high level job, for you
to get, right now. Basically, I was in the classic loop:
After a 4-year
degree in one of the most expensive countries in the world, you can imagine
that just sitting and waiting for someone to hire me was not an option. I had
to go back to my home country, which I swore I’d never do and get a local job,
which is what I also swore I would never do. But then I asked myself – would
Warren Buffet, Bill Gates or Alexander the Great complain about it if that
happens – I rather doubt it.
So, I got
back and rolled up my sleeves. I quickly understood that having a top foreign
education, good command of a few languages and all the necessary soft-skills in
a severely underdeveloped country, is actually the perfect playground to put
all my academic knowledge and skills to the test. I have written a few articles
on it and considering the length of this already, I will skip the details of
this part – but I got it all – experience, knowledge, influence, money (not Jeff
Bezos level, of course, but enough to live as good as possible) and above all –
self-confidence, that no matter where,
how or in what position, as long as I keep focus on my goals and take every
opportunity - I will succeed.
By the
age of 26, I had already experienced every field of recruitment and HR I could
and was time for me to move back to where I knew I had to be – abroad. I even
found a girl, that believed in me, as much as I did, and she followed me there.
We established ourselves in the UK, a perfect location for development, career
opportunities and high income (you can
refer to my previous article comparing recruitment in Bulgaria and the UK),
so you could say I was back on track. I worked hard, pushed even harder,
provided for ourselves and established myself in the business I was in, as well
as integrate into the British society.
A quick
milestone check could motivate me, that I am right on track – better, more
knowledgeable, more hard working, more dedicated than ever. With every single
job I doubled my salary, I was and am respected, I got every opportunity I asked
for. And then something happened.
You can
say, that the birth of my son, was a key point in the re-alignment of my goals,
or perhaps the moment, in which I actually understood what my goals really
meant. I did not care, if I would end up rich or not anymore, If I would be a
man of success or of respect. All I wanted, was for him to be happy, healthy
and to have a better life, than the one I had.
A child
is an incredible source of motivation – I worked harder than ever, I was more
focused, more dedicated, I was relentless in my pursuit to provide a good
standard of living. I no longer cared about the 11 months of rain, the boring
lack of social life or even the constant discrimination that East Europeans
have to endure these days in “Brexit” Britain.
But, as
the saying goes – “life is what happens
to you, while you’re busy making other plans”. My partner and I decided
that our lives are to go their separate ways, but having a child and being a
responsible father, meant that I must go back, yet again, to the one place I
never wanted to end up – back “home”. Worse yet, now that I have a child, that I love more than life itself, I knew that it will be
the end of my dream of an international career.
The reality
So here I
am, a few days away from my 30th birthday, the milestone, which was
to be an indication of how close I am to the dreams I always had. I love saying
that every situation in life is like a coin – with two sides of the same thing.
On one
end, you can evaluate my situation and a reality check will tell you this – I
am not abroad, I am not the manager, chairman or CEO of multi-national
corporation. I probably have less than 5,000 euro to my name, live on rent,
drive an old car, see my child 2 days a week, I am stuck in my home country, this
time for good. A bit gloomy, is it not?!
On the
other hand, however, I am still 29 years old. I have the best HR education I
could have gotten. I have a successful career of over 7 years in 4 countries on
2 continents. I have thrived, succeeded and left a mark in every job, project
or person I have worked in. I have all my friends, family, colleagues, my
lovely son a few streets away. I have enough income to live on the same
standard that middle-class in any developed country lives on. I have read more
books, met more people, learned more lessons than most people will in their
entire lives. I am working in an international organization with professionals
from all over the world, where I am respected, where I leave an impact on a
daily basis and develop the business, the team and myself. I help without
expecting anything in return, I smile every day and thank God for
everything in my life.
So … did
I become a man of success? I do not know, it is for others to say. What can be
measured is if I am a man with high net-worth – and I am not. But the most important lesson, that I have
learned, the most important lesson that you could and should learn, is that
worth and value are two different things. That the real value in life, is not
the money or resources you can achieve. It is not the career or setting you
thought you would have by now. It is not the recognition you desire or
expected. The real value is taking the lessons of life, of business, of
hardships and happiness and using them every single day, with every single
person, to make your life and theirs – better. To keep learning, to keep
working, to keep believing, to keep dreaming. To never stop pursuing your
goals, to be able to adapt them to the environment and stages of your life, to
never quit.
Should the blog of a young HR professional become the blog of a HR professional?
Now that
I am almost 30, many would say yes. I, however, will have to disagree. Age,
youth or even success is merely a point of view. You are young, as long as you
keep learning, keep experiencing, keep building, keep fighting, keep loving,
keep believing, keep hoping and keep knowing know little you know. I hope I
will always be a young HR professional. I hope I will never learn enough to be
satisfied or achieve enough to be contempt.
Of
course, I am no longer a young and promising “kid”, who uses his knowledge,
passion and charisma to achieve the business goals of the companies he works
in. I have to take a senior attitude towards all the tasks and matters at hand
– where I would allow myself to complain 7 years ago, today I have to show
positivism for the others around me. Where I would not care how long my job
would last 7 years ago, today I know I have taken responsibility to the people
I work with. Where I could watch movies till 2 a.m. or have a mid-week night
out 7 years ago, today I know I have too many peoples’ faiths in my hands to
jeopardize that. Where I knew I can always ask someone more senior to do
something instead of me, today I am that guy. Maturity in professionalism is understanding the impact of your actions
on a large scale, being selfless, keeping your word and being an example of
what you want to see in people.
Am I
going to achieve my lifetime goal – to become the world’s richest man – I
rather doubt it. But then again, was it ever my own goal, or just the
expectation of so many previous generations – I guess it never was my goal. So
perhaps, it is finally the time that I have understood what my goals are. You may ask what they
are, but the final lesson that I will share with you is that there are 3 things that no one should know about you
– your income, your private life and … your next move.
The journey is more important than the destination
30 professional and life lessons, from a young HR
I guess the
story got a bit too long, perhaps not as professional or business oriented, as
some of my previous articles. 10 years ago, I would have loved, instead of
reading the above to have the cheat-sheet of 30 important, or not, lessons to
take home. Today, however I guess I know why authors and professionals write
stories – because you can memorize facts, but if you want to learn the lessons
of life and business, you will have to experience them … or at least read a
story (which, by the way, contains exactly 30 life and business lessons).
